Now that we have that accomplished... I would like to tell you a little bit about where I am coming from here. For the past six months, my principal has said to me: "Have I told you about Walk Out, Walk On?" or "This is just like in Walk Out, Walk On..." or "Since reading Walk Out, Walk On..." at least once a day. This week one of the authors, Deborah Frieze came to Madison to talk about her work. As I walked away from the discussion that night, I knew that in the coming years, I would look back at that event as a seminal time that changed the way I think about my work.
As I finished reading the book this morning, I so badly wanted to write a blog entry about it, but right now, I think my mind is really just marinating in the stories and ideas and I can't seem to come up with one or two coherent thoughts. (Aren't you glad you are reading this blog?)
So, as I need some time to work with these ideas, I decided to share some of the most powerful selections from the book with you. If for some unknown reason you have not yet ordered your own copy, this should change your mind. Warning: some of these quotes reveal the really challenging ideas (and I would say truths) about living and working with others. Prepare to be disrupted.
Walk Out, Walk On Principals
Start anywhere, follow it everywhere.
We make our path by walking.
We have what we need.
The leaders we need are already here.
We are living the worlds we want today.
We walk at the pace of the slowest.
We listen, even to the whispers.
We turn to one another.
On playing instead of working...
"When we play, we're in a constant process of discovery, experimentation, risk-taking, and creation. We tinker. We invent. We dream and we imagine and we make believe until it's time to go our there and build the world we dream of" (59)."Yes, play creates chaos and redundancy and confusion. But it also creates the space in which we invent together, we inspire each other, and we talk through our differences" (61).
Assumptions that limit our ability to play...
-The answers exist out there - and the experts have them.
-To get things done, you need people of power and influence to champion your cause.
-Plan ahead and stick to your plan.
-Nothing gets done right unless you're in control.
-Don't ask for other people's opinions.
-We don't have time to experiment and tinker around.
-We mustn't fail! (And when we do, find someone to blame). (62)
"Play returns us to a state in which we can see what's possible - not what's so" (64).
On problems...
"What if we experts could acknowledge our frustration and become curious? What if we got interested in the interconnectedness of a problem rather than trying to hold it all within our one speciality? What if we noticed all the others who are connected to this problem, who are motivated to solve it?... We discover more is possible with curiosity than with certainty. We discover that not being right opens the space for other people's good ideas. We discover there are many people just like us, deeply committed to finding a solution" (96-97).
On gifting...
"We all have different needs for safety and security. But security can also come from relationships rather than stuff, and gift culture is an invitation to deepen our relationships" (145).
On intervention...
"However well intentioned the intervention might be, it is always rooted in the belief that people need help, they can't help themselves, and it is our duty to 'interrupt' their experience on their behalf" (170).
"Intervention is not fundamentally flawed... But it's a short-term strategy for the immediate situation; any longer-term change requires the engagement of the person or people" (171).
On becoming a host rather than a hero...
"'We believe that when human beings are invited to work together on what truly matters to them, they will take ownership and responsibility for moving their issues and ideas into wiser actions than the last'" (191).
"And it is time for us to give up our personal attempts at heroism. Are you acting as a hero? Here's how you know. You're acting as a hero when you believe that if you just work harder and put in more hours, you'll fix things; that if you just become smarter or learn a new technique, you'll be able to solve problems for others. You're acting as a hero if you take on more and more projects or causes, no matter how worthy, and have less time for the people you love and the activities that nourish you. You're playing the hero if you still hold the belief that it's up to you to save the situation, the person, the world" (210).
On Learning...
"Learning is not about getting it right or becoming the expert; it is about creating an environment of conviviality, discovery, and joyfulness" (25).
On Forgiveness...
"'To forgive is not to be altruistic. It is the best form of self-interest. What dehumanizes you, inexorably dehumanizes me. Forgiveness gives people resilience, enabling them to survive and emerge still human despite all the efforts to dehumanize them'" (82).
There is so much more I want to write, but I will leave it at that. I am excited to take up this lens with my work. There are some aspects that will be much harder for me than others, but I believe that I can do more through my community than I can do alone.
If you feel confused, intrigued, excited, I encourage you to read more. I would love to talk with anyone who does.
