An Open Letter to my Students or Why We Will Be Writing

This is a poem I wrote this week, my last week with the Greater Madison Writing Project Summer Institute. It started as a letter, but I think will end up as a spoken word piece. I hope it articulates who I am to as a writer/teacher of writing and my hopes for my students. Enjoy.

Well. It looks like we have all ended up in an English class.
Some of you rejoice.
Some of you shudder with horror.
Some of you exude indifference.

Maybe you are here because you know me and wanted to be here.
Maybe you are here because it fit into your schedule.
Maybe you are here because you need .5 English this semester.
Maybe you are here because you failed last year and you are hoping that second-time is a charm.

Throughout the semester, I will often tell you that I know everything.
(This is just a lie I say to be funny.)
But I do know this: whether you are rejoicing, shuddering or sleeping; whether you think you are here because of your schedule, your English credits, your failure,
I know that you are here,
That we all are here,
To remove ourselves from the illusion of our separateness.

You might call it English class,
I call it a journey.

The thing about our lives, although we all are in such different places,
is that no matter how we stack it
we are more alike than we are different.
And while the world often makes us feel alone in our struggles,
you can find in here:
peers and poets
storytellers and songs
that have asked the same questions that keep you up at night,
laughed at the same jokes (the kind that make your face hurt),
and cried the same tears that you are afraid to tell anyone about.
Because we all share the human condition,
and I can learn more from you
than you ever thought you had to give.

In our room we will read from authors:
in our midst
and outside.
We will write who we are,
what we know,
and why we dream for more.
I can tell you that you need to write to do well on the ACT, get into a good school, to get a job.
But I know that you already know that
and honestly,
I don’t think those are great reasons to write anyway.

We write so that we might come into our own lives - the people we were, are, and want to be.
I want you to know that writing is the hardest mountain to climb,
but will also slip effortlessly from your fingers like sand.
Writing is a risky cliff dive into icy water,
and it is coming home to fresh baked bread
all at the same time.

And this is another thing that I do know for sure:
Every time we write
we get better
and every time we write,
we become more fully ourselves.
I don’t care about your ACT score, where you go to school, or what you do to pay the rent.
I want to help you to learn to have a good life.
And if you are working to become better and more fully yourself
you will be well on your way.

I will ask a lot of you,
and I will always believe in you.
I promise to respect you,
to challenge you,
to grow with you.

Come as you are (it is the most important thing you can be).
Raise your pens, open your minds, and see:
that what exists between us is nothing more than the illusion of our separateness.
What exists between us means the world.

Greater Madison Writing Project or What I have been doing for the past two weeks.

Yesterday my friend Liza asked me to re-explain what I am doing in the writing project, and I realized it perhaps needs revisiting on the blog. In April, I was accepted into the first cohort of the Greater Madison Writing Project, a branch of the National Writing Project (NWP). All participants take part in a Summer Institute (SI) which for me, is Monday-Thursday from 9-3:30 in Madison at Olbrich Gardens throughout the month of July. Everyone who is involved is related to the education system: teachers (elementary, middle, high, post-secondary), librarians, instructional specialists, and graduate students.

The general philosophy of the NWP is that educators possess knowledge of best practices which often goes unshared; in the SI, each participant produces a "Teacher's Workshop" wherein they share what they are doing or plan to do in their classroom related to writing. So far, we have heard presentations about homeless and highly mobile students, Deborah Meier's Habits of Mind, authentic instruction, mindfulness practices, digital writing, writing workshops, and collaborative rubric writing. The wealth of knowledge amongst my peers is overwhelming and inspiring. In addition to this sharing, we spend a great deal of time reading, writing, and discussing various topics related to educational interests.

I feel blessed to be a part of this group; I am challenged and enriched by them every day. I have learned so much already and am excited to see where the next two weeks take us. This week, I had a realization as to how I am growing as a teacher and as an individual. It took the shape of a poem and I thought I would share it with you all here.

For a long time my voice was silenced
my own comparisons to others
and insecurities
telling me
"You are not as smart as they think you are"
"Yours is not as good"
"If you just worked harder, you would be better"
For a long time
I listened

All the while
(as all good hypocrites will do)
I worked every day to get my students to feel
good
strong
smart
about themselves
their work
their ideas
and their place in the world

But those words
lessons
truths
were for my students
not for me

I don't know why I have always been so hard on myself
Maybe the media's idea that women can be everything and nothing at the same time
Maybe my father's legacy of never feeling as though he achieved enough

Everyone told me that your 30's are better than your 20's because you know yourself better
and you don't worry about things so much anymore
I turned 30 last month
and I think it is starting to take hold

When I went to orientation for the GMWP, Melissa told me how powerful my writing was
I was sure she had me confused with someone else
Such a compliment from the director of the UW Writing Center (a huge force in my education)
was like gold to me

The voices and the insecurities started to build
but I stopped listening to them so much

I started a blog (!!)
people read it
and liked it

I go to the summer institute every day
and don't compare my work to others
but appreciate it

I share my work
writing
ideas
and have confidence that they are valuable

Someone brought up the idea that if we want it for our students
it has to start with us

It will be impossible for me to erase all of my insecurities
but I have a stronger - more supportive voice now
for my writing
for my students
for myself

APPLICATION FOR EMPLOYMENT

This is my second week of the Greater Madison Writing Project Summer Institute. I anticipated having a lot of things to post on the blog (which I do), but did not anticipate the lack of time to post. I am learning so much here every day and will have so many things to share and think through on this blog in the future. For now, I wanted to share a piece from a multi-genre assignment we are working on. Everyone in the institute was asked to write five separate pieces illustrating five different ways of looking at who we are. [Note: I will be using this assignment in my classes in the near future.] I focused on significant aspects of my life, one of which being teaching and the work I have done. As a genre, I settled on a job application (I don't think I have ever thought of a job application as a genre before, but work with me, people). So, below you will find my application/reflection on being a teacher. If you have read the blog before, some of this may sound familiar. Just goes to show that if you keep what you have written, you can use and re-use as needed. Thanks for reading.

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APPLICATION FOR EMPLOYMENT

GENERAL INFORMATION
Name: Orum, Bryn J. Also known as: Ms. Gross, Ms. Orum, Ms. O, Ms. G, Ms. O-G
Home Telephone: Call me when you need to, if you don’t have anyone else, I will come and_ help you.
Address: This one I am not going to tell you. Enough said.

Position Or Type Of Employment Desired: Teacher of English, reading and writing. I desire to be a positive influence in the lives of children. I seek to empower and inspire. 

Will Accept:
X Part-Time
X Full-Time
X Temporary
… Is teaching really anything but Full-Time?

Are you able to perform the essential functions of the job you are applying for, with or without reasonable accommodation? Define “reasonable accommodation”. Applicant will require that employer isunderstanding of regular emotional outbreaks of joy as well as crisis of confidence. Applicant has been known to take risks that many would find uncomfortable and be unabashedly herself at all times.

Salary Desired: I know I won’t be paid what I am worth. For that matter, I don’t believe you can put a price on these things. I expect to be paid fairly and respected for what I contribute to our society.
    
EDUCATION AND TRAINING (high school, college, graduate school, licenses, certifications, registrations, etc.) Check, check, check. What have I learned? What do I know? I know that I am rich with the experiences of my years, the words that I have been lucky enough to learn from, and I am ever curious and full of questions. I know that I am always learning. I believe education is for all.
    
WORK EXPERIENCE
Employer: Madison Metropolitan School District Position: Substitute Teacher

Lessons Learned: It is a myth that if you sub you will get a job in the school you are hoping to get into. Never take jobs to sub for middle school band classes. Don’t let their cuteness fool you, first graders can make you cry.

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Employer: McFarland and Edgerton High School Position: Summer School Teacher

Lessons Learned: It is a myth that teaching summer school will help you get a job in a school district. Don’t teach summer school... ever. Away from the comfort of my cooperating teacher, teaching in my own room can be scary.

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Employer: Big Foot Union High School Position: English and Speech Teacher

Lessons Learned: Just when you think no one will hire you, you get a job at the most unfortunately named school you applied to. Working an hour away from home is worth it (tell yourself this every day on your drive to and from work). Don’t underestimate parent entitlement. When a student is absent on every day that a speech is due, they are calling themselves in sick. Not all administrators are on your side. There are people out there willing to give you a shot. You need to have a little experience in order to get hired closer to Madison.

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Employer: Middleton Cross Plains Area School District Position: English Teacher

Lessons Learned: Doing good and lasting work is never going to be easy. Do not agree to

provide wake-up calls to students every morning. Be personal, but don’t take things personally. Believe in the process and be patient with yourself and them. Bring chocolate to meetings. Providing education to under-served populations is an act of social justice. Make friends with your librarian, he/she has lots of money to spend. If you give students something good to read and believe in them, they will really read it. Progress is more important than perfection. It is not my job to save them all (believing that it is will be the end of me)._

REFERENCES (or people who have helped me along the way):

Name: Becky Gross Relationship: Mom

I decided to become a teacher because of my mom. My mom has worked as a teacher and school social worker in a variety of settings over the course of her career. When I was little, she would get Christmas cards from former students thanking her for benefiting and sometimes saving their lives. I couldn't figure out exactly what this meant at the time, but I knew that other adults didn't get the same kinds of Christmas cards that my mom did

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Name: Chris Laing-Martinez Relationship: advisor to Amnesty International club in high school

Chris taught me that there was injustice in the world, but at the same time showed me how powerful social action could be. He taught me to be a voice for the voiceless, which I didn’t understand completely until I was able to be a voice for him in his time of need. When I started teaching, Chris wrote me a letter; at the end he told me he hoped I was doing well, he knew I would and that it was important to remember that as teachers, our lives are the hidden curriculum. I framed these words and keep it on my desk (and on my mind) always.

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Name: Vicki Shaffer Relationship: work-wife and co-English teacher

I had no idea what was coming to me when I was hired at MASH and teamed with Vicki Shaffer as a fellow English teacher. She has organized my life from classroom to relationships and is ever patient with me “great new ideas” for teaching English. Her wisdom balances my newness and her dedication to caring for all students inspires me. Vicki helps me remember that it is not the big, sweeping changes that we need to focus on, but the small everyday kindnesses that add up._

I certify the information contained in this application is true, correct, and complete. I understand that, if employed, false statements reported on this application may be considered sufficient cause for dismissal.


B. Orum 12 July 2011